The fourth reason #Lisa Firestone Ph.D., gives in her article, Why Am I Still Single? 8 Reasons People Often Stay #Single, is Pickiness. She states, “Our own defenses often leave us feeling pickier and more judgmental. This is particularly true after we’ve had bad experiences, where we were deceived or rejected…” She explains, “When viewing the world from critical or distrusting eyes, we tend to write off a range of potential partners before even giving them a chance. We think of dating certain people as ‘settling’ without ever seeing how that person could make us happy in the long-term.”
Ruth wasn’t judgmental. Boaz knew she could have gone after a younger richer or poorer man or pursued a Denzel Washington but she chose instead a man with a caring heart. Ruth was kind-hearted and her actions attracted someone who shared her values. Marriage isn’t about just physical attraction. Those qualities decline with age or can be lost due to an accident or illness. The poster boy today, maybe the couch potato, jobless, egotistical, arrogant loafer tomorrow.
It’s important that you are not deceived by appearances. They can change but core values of kindness, integrity, a strong work ethic, rarely change. If you keep telling yourself or listening to “friends” who agree and reinforce your view that there aren’t any decent hard-working men out there, your self-fulfilling prophecy will come true.
Ruth joined herself with her mother-in-law who wanted the best for her, had faith to believe marriage was possible and gave her strategies as to how to get a husband. If you want to get married, are your friends supportive, optimistic, or wise? Are they suggesting places to go, things you can do to improve yourself? Are you open to dressing better, exercising, or dating someone of a different race, nationality, or background?
If you really want something in life, you will go after it and avoid any excuses that stifle your dream. There are over 7.71 billion people in the world, surely God has one decent man for you. I dare you to trust God and not your so-called friends.